Yes, here’s another one. That’s all we need you may say. Maybe so, but this is also something that I need. As a brand new skeptic, thinker and doubter, I need a place to document my journey, my findings and facts as I interpret them.
I am no scholar by any stretch. Just a simple layman attempting to be a better husband and father. I’m also trying to make sense of life and religion, particularly this christianity thing I’ve attempted to follow for about 25 years.
I can elaborate more on my personal story later about how I got to where I am today. However for now I can just say I’ve grown tired of taking other people and pastors word that the bible is true. That there is a god. That we just need faith and we’ll be ok. I’m sorry, but I just have to be honest with myself. I can’t just take my beliefs on faith anymore.
So over the past year I’ve read the bible for myself, cover to cover. That in itself is another story. I guess I can say I didn’t start off reading the bible with any skepticism. In fact, I was reading as “daily closet time” to get closer to god. But by the time I was finished, I had some serious doubts.
As far as my personal beliefs now…well that is what this blog is all about. It is about a person who REALLY wanted to believe that the christian god was real. I wanted the “good” things that I had always heard about god to be true. It would be cool if there was an after life that I could continue to be with close friends and family. But like I said, I have my doubts.
Over the past several months I have grown quite passionate about my skepticism and critical thinking. I practically live, breathe and eat the stuff. I still read the bible almost daily, finding some pretty crazy and wack stuff. I know it may sound insane, but I love it. My critical passion for the bible and christianity is far more than the”passion” I had when I was a “christian.”
Now then, if any personal friends or family members (whom are mostly all christian) ever find this blog, I know they will be either quite upset, sad, dissapointed, mad or shocked. Or all the above. I understand those reactions. I had most of them when some one close to me went through the same thing. I know it is very hard to understand.
I know I don’t need to apologize for where I’m at. But I do want all readers of this blog to understand, that I don’t take my path lightly. It hasn’t been some emotional decision on my part. Like something happened in my life and now I “hate” god or some BS. Just continue to follow along on my blog here and I will let you know why I just don’t believe in the god of the bible any more. But be warned. If you don’t care to have your “faith” challenged or if you get upset when it is, this may not be the blog for you.
Another note to friends and family, I’m still me. I’m still the same person. So I hope all of this doesn’t change how you feel about me as a person. Your still a christian and I don’t feel any different about you. If things do change, well…I guess there’s nothing I can do about it.
Ok, so…I am really excited about the Doubting Dragon blog. Looking forward to posting, writing and possibly debating some stuff.
The Doubting Dragon