I have been a doubter, skeptic and critical thinker now for just over a year. So only recently have I been looking at the bible without my god glasses. It has been a new perspective to say the least. I remember as a christian reading the bible and skimming over or just accepting ignorance on the tough passages and mainly paying attention to the more “encouraging” verses. I looked for the scriptures that made me feel good. The ones that were easy to digest.
I can tell you over the past year, even though I had doubts and was thinking more critically about the bible and religious claims, there were times I still tried to hang on to faith. But the more I read, the more I had questions and doubted. It was very tough being around christian friends. Especially when they would pray. I tried to avoid praying as much as possible around others. Something about it just felt silly. Like we were just talking to ourselves. Now I know we were.
I do have to admit that I am still grateful to some of my christian friends who helped me through some tough times over the past year. I’ve not been able to talk to any of them about my unbelief.
I know I have a lot to learn. I still spend a lot of time reading the bible. However, I read it with a critical mindset. It has been quite fascinating. Seeing the flaws and contradictions. Seeing just how wrong the bible is and understanding the human errors it presents. It has become more clear that it is not an inspired text from some deity. Maybe the authors believed some of what they wrote about. But a lot of the new testament reads like it was written by factions with certain agendas in mind. Over all, the bible is not a book to follow for good morals. It fails in so many ways.
I have also been slowly learning about evolution. This is a topic that can get overwhelming, but is also quite captivating. It is clear to me that science is well on its way to discovering and has discovered so much about life. I am very new to studying and acquiring knowledge about evolution. I don’t see how anyone can ignore the evidence of fossil records and the science of evolution.
I get up every day and look forward to learning something new. I try to keep an open mind to what is truth. So far religion hasn’t shown anything that leads me to believe in a god. But I can conclude that if there is a god, it certainly isn’t the god of the christian bible.